Are we alone in an uncaring universe, or is God some kind of wiseguy?

It's just hard not to listen to TV: it's spent so much more time raising us than parents have.

With 'Futurama,' I was just worried that somebody would beat us to it; it seemed so obvious that there should be an animated science fiction show set in the future. And one of the reasons why it's not, I learned, is that it's really, really difficult.

A lot of our writers, like Conan O'Brien, moved on to other things.

The thing that makes me happiest about Simpsons Illustrated are all the drawings that we get from readers. I wish we could print them all. They're really imaginative. They show a lot of hard work.

I'm not going to stop torturing myself till I figure out the cause of my pain.

I'm better than dirt. Well, most kinds of dirt, not that fancy store-bought dirt... I can't compete with that stuff.