Everybody doesn't have to get every joke. People really appreciate not being condescended to.

The world ends when I die. And as far as I'm concerned, the rest of the universe might as well call it a day too.

'The Simpsons' is about alienation and the ambivalence of living with a family who you love but who drive you completely crazy.

I think in daily newspapers, the way comic strips are treated, it's as if newspaper publishers are going out of their way to kill the medium.

A lot of people believe that if everybody just did what they were told - obeyed - everything would be fine. But that's not what life is all about. That's not real. It's never going to happen.

I don't mind sharing the blame if she'll just admit she started it.

When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle. They're on TV!