Masturbation is nothing to be ashamed of. It's nothing to be particularly proud of, either.

Sometimes people try to read into my strip and find out what my state of mind is. And I can say if I'm in a good mood, generally the comic strip starts out in a good mood, but the punchline is very negative and sour.

English? Who needs that? I'm never going to England.

I grew up completely overwhelmed by TV, and part of the reason why I have gone into television is as a way to justify to myself all those wasted hours of watching TV as a kid. I can now look back and say, 'Oh, that was research.'

Cartooning is for people who can't quite draw and can't quite write. You combine the two half-talents and come up with a career.

The scary thing about the future... there will be tiny cameras everywhere, and they'll be flying around like mosquitoes and drones. That will be bad. Drones are scary. You can't reason with a drone.

God often gives nuts to toothless people.