I've spent so much of my adult life in relationships that it's actually quite pleasant to be alone at last. I turned thirty-six the other day, which staggers me when I think about it.

I want truth. I'm crying out to hear it. I need it like oxygen.

I'm the worst ad anyone could possibly be for abstaining from anything.

I once knew a girl who didn't know where anywhere was in the world. Not a clue. I asked her if she knew where Africa was and she answered, 'Is it the orange one on a map?'

I like a decent funeral, and God knows in my family we've seen enough of them. Looking through family photographs now is like watching an episode of 'Dad's Army.

I can't abide small talk.

I'm a Taurus, you know. A bull. I belong in a field.