Nine times out of 10, women don't want to fix a problem, they just want to be understood. I'll never get that.

I used to believe in a "Ms. Right", but now i know there is like 4 million "Ms. Rights" and it is just a matter of which one you meet first.

When I die, I'd like 'Friends' to be listed behind 'helping people.'

I learned to fall down early in life - I was like six - because I realized it was a way to make girls laugh.

Chandler's the guy everybody thinks will do well with women, but he thinks too much and says the wrong thing.

Ninety percent of video game AI really is pretty damn bad. I think that's actually why it's so much fun to shoot things. Because the AI is so bad and the characters are so annoying.

I've been accused of not really paying attention to a sentence unless my name comes up in it twice.