It must be that people who read go on more macrocosmic and microcosmic trips – biblical god trips, the Tibetan Book of the Dead, Ulysses, Finnegan’s Wake trips. Non-readers, what do they get? (They get the munchies.)

Nobody supports me at the expense of his own adventure. Then I get bitter: I am not loved enough to be supported. That I am not a burden has to compensate for the sad envy when I look at women loved enough to be supported. Even now China wraps double binds around my feet.

The key to a nice-looking lawn is a good mower. I recommend one who is muscular and shirtless.

When you go to make a purchase, take a look at the product and ask yourself: 'am I being cheated?' If a product from a 'fast fashion' chain is falling apart before you've even bought it, it's not a deal. It's the fast-fashion company trying to get you to buy something that is quick on trend but slow on quality.

I’ll tell you the secret to good teaching: make possible an experience without predetermining what that experience will be.

The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.

All I'm looking for is a guy who'll do what I want, when I want, for as long as I want, and then go away. Or wait nearby, like a Dust Buster, charged up and ready when needed.