I probably should be thinking of better ideas on how to promote myself, but I don't really spend a lot of time doing it. I really don't know how to promote effectively.

I imagine there's a level of narcissism that goes into thinking you're enough.

I take my coffee like I take my women... strong... black... and proud.

I think people just love to win.

I think in doing stand-up there are no rules and there's no architecture.

I'm trying to teach my children not to cry. That's the big thing. No crying. Because I think we can all agree that crying is, for the most part, for sissies. If my team loses, I'm going to cry. And I'm going to want my kids to see me crying. Not because I think sports are so important, but because I bet so much money on the game that we'll probably lose the house if my team doesn't win. That's something to cry about.

Things you never thought were going to turn into something end up being the most important things in your life. You have to learn to not try to control it.