There Has Ceased to Be a Difference Between My Awake Clothes and My Asleep Clothes

I think I've always wanted to be a role model, and I think ... everyone should try to live their life like they'd like to be a role model. I think it's like the thing keeping me out of jail.

I hated L.A. for a long time, and I wanted to leave it. I had these fantasies of going to 'SNL' and falling in love with some writer on 'SNL,' of getting married and living in New York.

Sarah [Silverman] writes her own jokes. She doesn't just go through her life and talk about everything. She sits down and crafts jokes. Sometimes her inspiration comes from areas of her life that are risqué. But she is an A-plus professional joke-writer in addition to being very attractive and a great performer.

I would rather have someone read my diary than look at my iPod playlists.

My mom always used to say, "You can't say I love you before you can say I." And I think that sort of makes sense.

A remarkable thing about me is that the time that elapses between a sad thought and a flood of tears is three or four seconds.