By the time Buffy finished its Bay Area theatrical run - including a two-month stint at the dollar theater - I had seen the movie well over three dozen times. I was in love.

Our story opens where countless stories have ended in the last twenty-six years: with an idiot -- in this case, my brother, Shaun -- deciding it would be a good idea to go out and poke a zombie with a stick to see what happens.

Post-traumatic shock,' said Shaun. 'He thinks he's a boa constrictor.

Most guys my age have girlfriends and drinking buddies on their speed dial. Me, I have the Memphis CDC.

The difference between the truth and a lie is that both of them can hurt, but only one will take the time to heal you afterward.

Dramatic exits are the last refuge of the infantile personality

Time never runs backward when I need it to. Not for me, and not for anyone else.