Have you ever tried sugar or PCP?

My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana. I said 'No, but I want a regular banana later, so... yeah.'

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.

I think foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs.

If you want to talk to me after the show, I'd be surprised.

I have an underwater camera just in case I crash my car into a river, and at the last minute I see a photo opportunity of a fish that I have never seen.

I went to a restaurant with my friend, and he said, "Pass the salt." I said, "Screw you! Sit closer to the salt."