Mitch”, but then reattach it and call it “Mitch-all-together.

I have an idea for sweatshops: air conditioning! That's simple. 14 year old boys working twelve hour days? "Yeah, but they're comfortable!"

I had the cab driver drive me here backwards, and the dude owed me $27.50.

If 13 is unlucky, then 12 and 14 are guilty by association.

I find a duck's opinion of me is very much influenced by whether or not I have bread.

I was going to stay overnight at my friend's house - he said, "you'll have to sleep on the floor." Damn gravity! You don't know how bad I wanted to sleep on the wall.

You got to always take advantage of getting your room cleaned. You may think it's nice not to have anybody in your room, like your privacy's not being invaded. But there's nothing like walking back into a clean room. You've got to remember that.