Dogs are joiners; if they were guys, their idea of a good time would be to attend an Elks luncheon.

We all know how cats feel about traveling in a car. You never see a cat with his head out the window, fur flying in the breeze. A cat is never anyone's designated driver.

Dogs are joiners; if they were guys, their idea of a good time would be to attend an Elks luncheon.

My weight is always perfect for my height - which varies.

Cooking Tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out.

Getting old in America ... best to do it somewhere else.

Hi, this is Sylvia. I'm not at home right now, so when you hear the beep ... hang up.