I can take any amount of criticism, as long as it is unqualified praise.

A bloody good thing, but too late.

We have no reliable guarantee that the afterlife will be any less exasperating than this one, have we?

I'm an enormously talented man, and there's no use pretending that I'm not.

Everybody worships me, it's nauseating.

It's never too early for a cocktail.

Sunburn is very becoming - but only when it is even - one must be careful not to look like a mixed grill.