What I adore is supreme professionalism. I’m bored by writers who can write only when it’s raining.

Marriage is the aftermath of love.

I have always paid income tax. I object only when it reaches a stage when I am threatened with having nothing left for my old age - which is due to start next Tuesday or Wednesday.

The Stately Homes of England, How beautiful they stand, To prove the Upper Classes, Have still the Upper Hand.

Criticism and Bolshevism have one thing in common. They both seek to pull down that which they could never build.

We have no reliable guarantee that the afterlife will be any less exasperating than this one, have we?

Wit is like caviar - it should be served in small portions and not spread about like marmalade.