I don't hate Coldplay to be cool I genuinely hate Coldplay.

Imagine that, a poncho sombrero combo, I'll be off my tits on happiness.

When I was 14, I saw someone getting their face and wrists slashed with a knife in a pub in Catford. Nobody lifted a finger. That's when I realised that violence wasn't funny. At all.

I could get an audience into my world and if you can do that, they'll go with you not all the way, but a lot of the way.

If you're going to be a good standup, or a successful standup, or a standup who can work for money, you have to eliminate the possibility of dying quickly.

When I was three or four, I was really good at drawing and painting, and everyone used to say, "You're going to go to art college." I didn't really know what that meant.

I did work in a bakery for one day. But the boss went off and when he came back I was lying on the floor eating cakes.