I was in the band as a boy and was taught music and learned to compose.

I was born in London, and went to school in Scotland - I used to be dead tired when I got home at night.

I was born in very sorry circumstances. Both of my parents were very sorry

It was absolutely thrilling to meet Laurel and Hardy, they were so nice.

I used to first go on to entertain an audience. But now I go, and this is really true - I go on to have fun with a crowd of my chums.

There are people who like just ordinary comedy fun, and making mistakes - which I do easily - and then there are people who like the falling over.

You know I've got a chum, a smashing mate, he's got a dog with no legs, and he calls it a cigarette. It's true, yeah, because at nighttime he has to take it out for a drag.