Do what you must, but do it well, above all enjoy yourself!

But the trouble is that when you drink it, you invariably meet other people drinking it.

I like to give my inhibitions a bath now and then.

I would much rather end up a fertiliser under a sunflower which is eventually made into sunflower seed oil so that instead of nibbling me in her prawn cocktail, the pretty girl will rub me on her bristols as she suns herself on a beach in the Caribbean.

I'm only drinking white wine because I'm on a diet and I don't eat.

I wouldn't like to see a chick of mine taking her clothes off and kissing a fellow on screen. And my girls must get very hurt when they see me doing it.

I have two ambitions in life: one is to drink every pub dry, the other is to sleep with every woman on earth.