I don't have a drink problem. But if that was the case and doctors told me I had to stop, I'd like to think that I would be brave enough to drink myself into the grave.

But the trouble is that when you drink it, you invariably meet other people drinking it.

I'm not as thrilled with myself as I used to be.

I'm only drinking white wine because I'm on a diet and I don't eat.

I'm really a pacifist.

I'm not a villain, I've never hurt anyone. I'm just a tawdry character who explodes now and again.

I like to give my inhibitions a bath now and then.