The only really firm rule of taste about cross dressing is that neither sex should ever wear anything they haven't yet figured out how to go to the bathroom in.

Veal is a very young beef and, like a very young girlfriend, it's cute but boring and expensive.

Making fun of born-again Christians is like hunting dairy cows with a high powered rifle and scope.

Long conversations with pals when neither you nor they have had a drink can be a test of palship.

They don't like anyone who isn't Korean, and they don't like each other all that much, either. They're hardheaded, hard-drinking, tough little bastards, 'the Irish of Asia'.

Children from the age of five to ten should watch more television. Television depicts adults as rotten SOB's given to fistfights, gunplay, and other mayhem. Kids who believe this about grownups aren't likely to argue about bedtime.

Globalization is simply opening the free marketplace to encompass the entire world.