You can always reason with a German. You can always reason with a barnyard animal, too, for all the good it does.

I arrived in the middle of a press conference - as boring a thing to sit through if you don't know the language as it is if you do.

Bill Maher can be pretty good, except when he gets "important." Maher's all over the place politically.

Globalization is simply opening the free marketplace to encompass the entire world.

So what if I don't agree with the Democrats? What's to disagree with? They believe everything. And what they don't believe, the Republicans do. Neither of them stands for anything they believe in, anyway.

In the Third World, honk your horn only under the following circumstances: 1. When anything blocks the road. 2. When anything doesn't. 3. When anything might. 4. At red lights. 5. At green lights. 6. At all other times.

To really enjoy drugs you've got to want to get out of where you are. But there are some wheres that are harder to get out of than others. This is the drug-taking problem for adults. Teenage Weltscbmerz is easy to escape. But what drug will get a grown-up out of, for instance, debt?