It was to be a short visit for the G-shevs. More than four days in the U.S. and Raisa's VISA card bill would shatter the fragile Soviet economy.

Microeconomics is about money you don't have, and macroeconomics is about money the government is out of.

There aren't many political humorists. Dave Barry is excellent, but he doesn't do it much.

Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.

Whatever the occasion, do not neglect alcohol. No other refreshment will do. Yes, alcohol kills brain cells, but it's very selective. It only kills the brain cells that contain good sense, shame, embarrassment, and restraint.

I do have to travel a lot for speaking engagements.

Men generally pay for all expenses on a date ... either sex, however, may bring a little gift, its value to be determined by the bizarrness of the sexual request to be made later that evening.