It had never occurred to us that the Kremlin's new anti-booze campaign would apply to journalists. Now, that's a human-rights violation.
P. J. O'RourkeThe whole idea of our government is this: If enough people get together and act in concert, they can take something and not pay for it.
P. J. O'RourkeGambling is so pervasive in Nevada that maybe the state should just go the whole hog. There'd be gum machines that dispensed chewing tobacco if you lost. You could gamble for the toilet paper in public bathroom stalls. And fill out Keno cards in an attempt to win cancer therapy at the hospital.
P. J. O'Rourke