The political process consists entirely of politicians talking out of their butts.

Nothing bad is going to happen to us. If we get fired, it's not failure; its a midlife vocational reassessment.

Automobiles are free of egotism, passion, prejudice and stupid ideas about where to have dinner. They are, literally, selfless. A world designed for automobiles instead of people would have wider streets, larger dining rooms, fewer stairs to climb and no smelly, dangerous subway stations.

Political systems are run by self-selecting politicians. We don't draft people; it's not jury duty.

You start out with Mad magazine, and you go right through the sort of black humor of Lenny Bruce, Lord Buckley, Mort Sahl, Paul Krassner... If you put Lenny together with Mad magazine and run it through the brain of a college student, you get National Lampoon.

When I became a man, I put away childish things and got more elaborate and expensive childish things from France and Japan.

I like to take things that are boring-but-important and try to make them interesting. That was definitely what I was after with Eat The Rich.