I suppose I should get a VCR, but the only thing I like about television is its ephemerality.

The purpose of the Senate is to keep 100 middle aged knuckleheads out of the private sector where they can do real harm.

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

Everybody in 15th century Spain was wrong about where China was and as a result, Columbus discovered Caribbean vacations.

During the mid-1980s dairy farmers decided there was too much cheap milk at the supermarket. So the government bought and slaughtered 1.6 million dairy cows. How come the government never does anything like this with lawyers?

The larger the German body, the smaller the German bathing suit and the louder the German voice issuing German demands and German orders to everybody who doesn't speak German. For this, and several other reasons, Germany is known as 'the land where Israelis learned their manners'.

I'm a registered Republican and consider socialism a violation of the American principle that you shouldn't stick your nose in other people's business except to make a buck.