Once you buy a prize, it's yours to keep.

If any group of citizens is uniquely unqualified to tell someone else how to vote, it's those of us who live in the sheltered, privileged arena of celebrity hood......Trust me, one's view of the world isn't any clearer from the back seat of a limo.

I suspect most self-described 18-year-old Scandinavian women named Inga who collect and wear string bikinis are, in reality, more likely to be middle-aged, pot-bellied guys named Lou who collect and wear string cheese.

Global warming alarmists are unpatriotic racists knowingly misleading for their own ends.

I said yes, which turned out to be the right answer.

Political pornography is not unlike the sexual kind: difficult to define, but you know it when you see it

Anyone who has seen me spin that heavy, giant wheel on television knows that I'm not a steroid user