The crazy thing is that I really wasn't under any pressure. My contract wasn't going to expire until the end of 2008, and everyone was satisfied with me. But I wasn't. I always wanted to improve.

Riders called me up afterwards to say that they had had no other choice. I couldn't understand the way they changed their tune.

I wasn't in a position to defend myself. Sometimes it's a brutal profession. The first thing I thought of at the time was revenge. I have a more levelheaded take on the issue today.

Of course they were saying: No doping! But as a rider, it's difficult to believe that things can really change from one day to the next.

The crazy thing is that I really wasn't under any pressure. My contract wasn't going to expire until the end of 2008, and everyone was satisfied with me. But I wasn't. I always wanted to improve.

The patient in the bed next to me told me that the newspapers were reporting on the test, and it was on television all day long.

The truth is that things were already going so poorly for me that nothing surprised me anymore. But then the BKA sent 20 agents to search my house.