If I hadn't become a celebrity, I'd probably be an alcoholic.

Politicians... talk in generalities and lies, and I think they've caused all our grief. They're so awful, they're really funny. I hate thinking this because my dad loved politics.

The dining room in my old house was truly magnificent, but by far the worst room for conversation. I'd get up from the table, a very long table, and somebody would always say, Paul, I never got to talk to you.

My dad was a ham, too. He could sell those women anything. Of all his sons, I was the only one he could trust to sell as well as he could. I was proud of that.

My father was adamant in his disapproval of my interest in show business.

I cant stand those food cult people who bring their own food into the house. All those little thermoses and paper bags-it makes the other guests uncomfortable.

I can't even get three weeks off to have cosmetic surgery.