If I hadn't become a celebrity, I'd probably be an alcoholic.
Sandwiches are wonderful. You don't need a spoon or a plate!
Outsiders develop humor as a defense; why do you think most comedians are gay or Jewish?
The whole romantic part of my life was a wipeout. I didn't even own a belt.
A closet full of wire hangers can be the most dangerous place in the world.
The doctor's name was Sylvia. I told her she'd have a problem with me because Sylvia was my mother's name.