If I hadn't become a celebrity, I'd probably be an alcoholic.
My following is straight. I'm so glad.
I sang in the choir for years, even though my family belonged to another church.
Outsiders develop humor as a defense; why do you think most comedians are gay or Jewish?
I can't even get three weeks off to have cosmetic surgery.
Politicians... talk in generalities and lies, and I think they've caused all our grief. They're so awful, they're really funny. I hate thinking this because my dad loved politics.