What was I drinking last night? Furniture polish?

I go in the butchers and there's not a lot of meat I can eat these days, with having all the animals.

It's become normal for me to walk on set as Popeye, Frankenstein or an Elf or even a chicken.

Channel 4 are a great bunch of people to work with and the crew are lovely. Working at ITV was like being in the court of Caligula.

I dress up as a middle-aged prostitute and do a game show.

I dont live with people, thats why my relationships last. Im not romantic. Even when I was a teenager if somebody asked if they could hold my hand Id say, - no, its not heavy, I can hold it myself, thank you.

What was I drinking last night? Furniture polish?