I have terrible short-term memory loss, which I like to think of as Presidential eligibility.

I love talking to the audience, and I must be the luckiest performer in the world. I always land something or somebody that just takes off.

The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.

I have terrible short-term memory loss, which I like to think of as Presidential eligibility.

I don't have a bank account because I don't know my mother's maiden name and apparently that's the key to the whole thing right there. I go in every few weeks and guess.

I get the first flight out from anywhere I am because I have to come home to my kids.

I have a horrible memory and I used to consider that a liability, but I've learned along the way that talking to people is really a beautiful thing.