If the bible were published as fiction, no reviewer would give it a passing grade. There are some vivid scenes and quotable phrases but there's no plot, no structure, a tremendous amount of filler and the characters are painfully one dimensional. Whatever you do, don't read the bible for a moral code. It advocates prejudice, cruelty, superstition and murder. Read it because we need more atheists.

A lot of older parents worry about being older parents. I hear people say, 'I don't want to be too old to play baseball with my son.' They worry that their kids will be embarrassed by their parents' age.

Hypocrisy is annoying but not evil. Someone who says one thing and does another has doubled their chances of being half right.

Everybody prefers to see a nut - they're more fascinating.

The most important part of life is work, it's the flow, it's getting stuff done, feeling like you're doing something.

There are performers who have built their whole career doing magic on TV and can't really perform live at all - don't really have jobs and skills.

All David Blaine is is a good-looking magician.