Oscar Wilde said that the gods punish us in two ways: first, they don't give us what we want, then, they do. He forgot the third way: we finally see the cost of getting it.

Realize the complicated specials of what we call the "inferiority complex." In other words, what, Miss Thing, is so damn special about you to make you feel so specially inferior to any other jerk?

Try to dwell on the people you'd like to love, instead of all the people you do loathe.

The most beautiful man in the world says everything with his eyes, and the rest with his hands and mouth.

The lowest form of barbarism is smugly to berate someone for extending an act of kindness.

Gays feel about popularity the same way teenage girls do. Is it that we really want friends we can count on, or do we just want guys around us whom we can share our curlers with?

Have hot, wild sex with a friend. Then go out and do something stupid, like bowl, afterwards.