It doesn't look like much work goes on at this university.
[after accepting a gift from a Kenyan woman] You are a woman, aren't you?
Dontopedalogy is the science of opening your mouth and putting your foot in it, which I've practised for many years.
If a cricketer suddenly decided to go into a school and batter a lot of people to death with a cricket bat, are you going to ban cricket bats?
That's a nice tie... Do you have any knickers in that material?
I never see any home cooking - all I get is fancy stuff.