Who would want to break into [the music business]? It's like a bank that's already been robbed.

But if you're doing something, show up everyday, and something good might happen - it's not going to happen if you don't show up.

This one guy's wife is such a pretty brown thing, that I'm liable to give her a poke or two. Whaddaya think of that?

Some day you do something where you use everything you know. You don't do it ostentatiously where you see the workings going on. But some day, if you're lucky, that will happen.

You know, they say you can reduce genius to someone who spent 10,000 hours trying to get good at something. I'm not claiming either one of those. I haven't done anything for 10,000 hours but sleep. But you do stuff enough, you get better at it. Usually it's a simple thing like that. Essentially, a brainless endeavor.

I think the tax cut is ridiculous but so am I.

If I were to die tomorrow, I think they'd say Newman 56, composer of the hit song, Short People. Jumped off a mountain today.