Who would want to break into [the music business]? It's like a bank that's already been robbed.

More of my songs are intended to be funny than almost anyone else. Sometimes maybe it cheers me up a bit. I've got a distance from it. Sometimes what I'm writing is more important to me than the rest of my life. It's more important to me that I'm writing well than anything else.

I'm dreaming of a white president. Just like the ones we've always had. A real live white man. Who knows the score, how to handle money or start a war. Wouldn't even have to tell me what we were fighting for. He'd be the right man, if he were a white man.

I always thought my best album was 'Trouble in Paradise.' I was the happiest with that one.

If I were to die tomorrow, I think they'd say Newman 56, composer of the hit song, Short People. Jumped off a mountain today.

Crank up the Beach Boys, Baby.

I once had dinner with Madonna and I wasn't nervous but within about a minute I found myself talking about underwear.