It's easy to be smart when you are parodying smart people.

Tradition, history and respect; that kind of qualities I admire, that I want to see preserved. Time is the only commodity that matters. Being successful doesn't make you manage your time well; managing your time well makes you successful. Goals, Priorities, and Planning. Why am I doing this? What is the goal? Why will I succeed? What happen if I chose not to do it? 'Good judgement comes from experience, experience comes from bad judgement'.

It's very important to know when you're in a pissing match. And it's very important to get out of it as quickly as possible.

I was trying to put myself in a bottle that would one day wash up on the beach for my children. If I were a painter, I would have painted for them. If I were a musician, I would have composed music. But I am a lecturer. So I lectured.

Because you’re such a good salesman, and if you go work for a company, they’re going to use you as a salesman. If you’re going to be a salesman, you might as well be selling something worthwhile, like education

Most people who have told a lie think they got away with it … when in fact, they didn’t

Throughout my academic career, I'd given some pretty good talks. But being considered the best speaker in the computer science department is like being known as the tallest of the Seven Dwarfs.