Certain things should be yours to have when you work your way to the top.

Sanford and Son is more than just a name. It's a condition, a dynasty, an empire. This here is the finest pile of junk of the world.

I carry a knife now because I read in a white magazine that all black people carry knives. So I rushed out and bought me one.

Do you realize that if the pilgrims have been chasing bobcats instead of turkeys.. we'd all be eating pussy on Thanksgiving?!

It's some chopped liver. That's Jewish soul food.

What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom? A pickpocket snatches watches.

Music played a large role in the survival of the black people in America — that and a sense of humor that just couldn't be enslaved.