If you would have God hear you when you pray, you must hear him when he speaks.
People who are brutally honest get more satisfaction out of the brutality than out of the honesty.
People are like birds - from a distance, beautiful: from close up, those sharp beaks, those beady little eyes.
God punishes us mildly by ignoring our prayers and severely by answering them.
The seven ages of man: spills, drills, thrills, bills, ills, pills and wills.
When a man tells me he's run out of steam in the sex department, I'll tell him, 'Count your blessings; you've escaped from the clutches of a cruel tyrant. Enjoy!