Someone trying to be funny probably isn't as funny as someone who doesn't want to be funny but is and can't help it. Someone being serious or angry might be funny. If you get angry, the first thing I want to do is laugh because I don't know why you're getting that angry. Pathos makes me laugh, funerals make me laugh.

If your boss is getting you down, look at him through the prongs of a fork and imagine him in jail.

I've never been insulted by hateful satanists for not believing in their devil. Only by loving Christians for not believing in their God.

I fought a bear once. But it started crying, so I let it off.

Telling someone with depression to pull themselves together is about as useful as telling someone with cancer to just stop having cancer

What will it feel like after you die? Exactly the same as it felt for those billions of years before you were born.

Atheism is the lack of belief in a god (or gods). It makes no claim. It merely rejects the claim that a god (or gods) exists. Nothing more.