When I grew up, people said, 'You'll never be the man your dad was.' And I said, 'Gee, I hope not.'

Is it necessary for me to drink my own urine? No, but I do it anyway because it’s sterile and I like the taste.

I've got two old Volvos, two old Subarus, and an old Ford Ranger. If you've got an old car, you've gotta have at least several old cars, 'cause one's always gonna be in the garage.

If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball.

When I grew up, people said, 'You'll never be the man your dad was.' And I said, 'Gee, I hope not.'

Don't ever humiliate a man. If you're gonna have to dress him out, you take him aside and do it that way. That's the one thing I don't like about Hollywood: They go in for public humiliation. You shouldn't do that to a man.

If you're lucky enough to have a pretty girl love you and share herself and sleep with you, make that your secret. The best way to spoil love is by talking to too many people about it.