If you're lucky enough to have a pretty girl love you and share herself and sleep with you, make that your secret. The best way to spoil love is by talking to too many people about it.

I honor religion except when it gets into shedding blood.

Be your own politics, grow your own garden, and maybe you can help out more.

When I grew up, people said, 'You'll never be the man your dad was.' And I said, 'Gee, I hope not.'

Is it necessary for me to drink my own urine? No, but I do it anyway because it’s sterile and I like the taste.

Never think you're better than anyone else, but don't let anyone treat you like you're worse than they are.

I've got two old Volvos, two old Subarus, and an old Ford Ranger. If you've got an old car, you've gotta have at least several old cars, 'cause one's always gonna be in the garage.