The last thing I have to say is that ice is the past tense of water. I've always wanted to write that sentence and now I have.

The only people are those who don't love anybody.

Gossip is irresponsible communication.

If critics want to help me, let them come sit next to me while I'm writing.

I am a comic writer, which means I get to slay the dragons, and shoot the bull.

Alcohol is an allergy of the body and an obsession of the mind.

I believe the true function of age is memory. I'm recording as fast as I can.