My mother was very, very Protestant. I grew up Presbyterian, and I went to church every Sunday until I was 18. I was forced to.

Once I found out how much an Off-Off-Broadway actor makes, I was whoring myself out the next day.

I've always defined myself as a writer, I've never decided what it was I was gonna write. [...] I always fancied myself one, but I'm not. I'm so far from a writer.

I remember saying in college that I would never do commercials.

I actually got the part. And I thought, Well, I'll do it for a while. I'll just quit if it's stupid.

I remember interviewing someone I actually felt bad for, and therefore didn't want to take an ironic stance against him. It actually turned out to be a really funny piece.

Anything that you can do a tiny bit of research about, I'll turn it into an obsession.