I don't know how this company got the name National Shakespeare Company, because it was literally like retards employing retards.

Sometimes we have to actually say, I think you're really funny, but none of your jokes are going to make it on the air. So just answer my questions. Seriously.

I get all of my comedy from CNN.

You're encouraged to pitch your own story. That way, you'll have more control over what you do.

My job was basically to look at a good friend completely naked and rub lotion on her back. I was naked too, but I got to put a towel on almost immediately. So I was like, "Well, this is going to be embarrassing, but it's also going to be kinda awesome."

The head writer loves that my character is a boor.

I learned more about elections on election night 2000 than I ever did during my 16 years of schooling.