Small change can often be found under seat cushions.

But when they began handing out doctorates for comparative folk dancing and advanced fly-fishing, I became too stink in’ proud to use the title. I won’t touch watered whiskey and I take no pride in watered-down degrees.

The meek shall inherit the earth - a 6 foot plot above them.

Love is what still goes on when you're not horny.

If you wanted to teach a baby a lesson, would you cut its head off?

Once a man gets a reputation as a liar, he might as well be struck dumb, for people do not listen to the wind.

Do this. Don't do that. Stay back in line. Where's tax receipt? Fill out form. Let's see license. Submit six copies. Exit only. No left turn. No right turn. Queue up and pay fine. Take back and get stamped. Drop dead— but first get permit.