But compared with the task of selecting a piece of French pastry held by an impatient waiter a move in chess is like reaching for a salary check in its demand on the contemplative faculties.

After an author has been dead for some time, it becomes increasingly difficult for his publishers to get out a new book by him each year.

This is a test. It is only a test. Had it been an actual job, you would have received raises, promotions, and other signs of appreciation.

I never liked bananas much anyway. Two-thirds of the way down even one banana I am willing to concede defeat smilingly and give the rest to the nearest monkey.

There seems to be no lengths to which humorless people will not go to analyze humor. It seems to worry them.

Central Park is the grandiose symbol of the front yard each child in New York hasn't got.

We call ourselves a free nation, and yet we let ourselves be told what cabs we can and can't take by a man at a hotel door, simply because he has a drum major's uniform on.