In a house where there are small children the bathroom soon takes on the appearance of the Old Curiosity Shop.

The only cure for a real hangover is death.

It was one of those plays in which all of the actors unfortunately enunciated very clearly.

The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.

I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.

There seems to be a common strain of miserliness in the American people when it comes to throwing away toothpaste tubes which havea little left in the bottom.

Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other.