There are several ways to apportion the family income, all of them unsatisfactory.

Other men wear white suits in summer and it doesn't seem to bother them. But my white suit seems to be a little whiter than theirs. I think also that it may have something written on the back of it, although I can't find it when I take the suit off.

There is no doubt that every healthy, normal boy...should own a dog at some time in his life, preferably between the ages of forty-five and fifty.

Who said time machines haven't been built yet? They already exist. They're called books

There may be said to be two classes of people in the world; those who constantly divide the people of the world into two classes and those who do not.

Next to an old-fashioned church social, or possibly a monster bridge party, there is no buzz which can equal the sibilant buzz ofa matinée.

The wise man thinks once before he speaks twice.