We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.

Acting is different from stand-up. It gives you this ability to enter into another character, to create another person.

I just want to do movies, and I want to sell them. I don't want to link up with some product.

On rides you see things that trigger ideas. And most the time it's just not doing anything but riding ... letting it all go.

Women! Can't live with 'em, can't live with 'em!

The French don't have a baseball team. And if they did, there'd only be a left field, and no one would be safe.

In England, if you commit a crime, the police don't have a gun and you don't have a gun. If you commit a crime, the police will say 'Stop, or I'll say stop again.'