Just when exactly does the Millennium begin? Some say 1999, some say 2000, and some say 2001. You wait a thousand years for one, and three turn up at once.

I love the 6 Nations rugby. I feel very Scottish then. I feel very Scottish now, sitting in the middle of Chelsea. But thats part of our heritage - being part of Britain, part of Europe. I love being European.

I have late onset ADHD. I take on too much and end up spinning plates, but its entertaining, and it helps you make quick connections if youre a comedian, if you have a brain that can dance around too much.

Now I'm instantly nervous about the demands of doing a weekly column.

It is a weird thing, because most people tend to get more conservative as they get older, but I find myself going the opposite way. I am sure that by the end I will be selling Marxist pamphlets on the Holloway Road.

People may say that what I do is very clever, but it's not really at all. It's not Swift.

I had an Edinburgh, middle-class childhood and a public school education.